Asynchronous communications


I bet you thought
that I’d forgot
your bidet.

Would I do a thing like that? *

the wonders
of modern technology:

The machine
reminds me
that your burfday
is coming up;

The machine
allows me
to send you a card
(without even
leaving my chair
to go to the shop
to choose
an expensive
bit of card
that will just
end up as landfill
after the event);

The machine
‘sends the card’
in the early hours
of your burpday morning;

The machine
that you have
a bionic implant
that allows you
to connect to it
from wherever you are;

The machine
fails to warn me
(other than in an
advance disclaimer
roundabout way) that
the anniversary
of your birth is
almost at an end,
you haven’t yet
picked up the card;

The machine
is a pain
in the gluteus maximus
and deserves a big kick
in the same general area.

In short: Sorry.

Sorry I missed your birthday
(coz in effect,
that’s what happened).

Hope it was a good one!


if I didn’t have
the machine
to remind me.

About pendantry

Phlyarologist (part-time) and pendant. Campaigner for action against anthropogenic global warming (AGW) and injustice in all its forms. Humanist, atheist, notoftenpist. Wannabe poet, writer and astronaut.
This entry was posted in Ludditis. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Asynchronous communications

  1. Polly says:

    So funny 🙂 !!!!!!!!!!


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