The pessimist accuses it of being dangerously half empty.
The optimist, beaming, positively insists: ‘No, half FULL!’
The cynic considers there may be too little, or too much.
The philosopher contemplates all fluids existing outside.
The narcissist corrects his coiffure in his reflections.
The spiritualist seeks answers from a happy medium.
The artist adroitly trims the vessel’s upperness.
The alcoholic downs it and orders another.
The surrealist gets himself drunk.
The realist uses a straw.
The idiot up-ends it on his head.
The pragmatist shrugs and takes a sip.